Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
Be nice.
No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

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Absolutely (slrpnk.net)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Close!

This has been a Brit thing for a decade or so, particularly Scots and Northern English. The idea is to use a noun that could already be a slightly insulting word to start with, like 'potato' in the example

You absolute donkey

You absolute cabbage

You absolute bin-bag

You absolute Belgian

Etc etc

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

On a similar note, with an "absolutely" and a word ending in "ed", you get words which mean "very inebriated/stoned"

Common

absolutely battered
absolutely blathered
absolutely pissed
absolutely wankered
absolutely trolleyed
absolutely shitfaced
absolutely twatted

Less common

absolutely potatoed
absolutely cultured
absolutely traffic coned
absolutely fishcaked
absolutely Belgianed
absolutely bin-bagged
absolutely cabbaged
absolutely Tobleroned

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

"absolutely" in this context can be replaced by "pure" if you're a weegie

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

"You absolute melt" is my favourite. Uttered by a GBBO baker about himself in the latest episode.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I think houseplant and fishtank kind of work in this context.