this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2024
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Russian President Vladimir Putin has suffered an emabarassing setback as his feared Satan 2 nuclear arsenal failed four out of five missile tests, according to arms experts and satellite imagery from the launch site.

High-resolution satellite images of the launch pad at Russia's Plesetsk test site, where the RS-28 Sarmat intercontinental ballistic missile exploded, shows extensive damage.

A crater approximately 60 meters wide at the launch silo at the Plesetsk Cosmodrome in northern Russia, along with visible damage in the surrounding area that was not present in images taken earlier in the month.

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[–] [email protected] 149 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

They didn't. They named it "Sarmat".

NATO also had reporting names for Soviet weapons. IIRC surface-to-surface missiles start with "S". A few are rather...less-than complimentary, "Satan" -- the name used for the weapon that this replaces -- probably being the most so.

This missile doesn't have the reporting name "Satan 2" for NATO, though. The only link it has with the original surface-to-surface missile with the NATO reporting name "Satan" is that it's supposed to replace it and so Western media, which very much enjoyed mentioning "Satan" wherever possible, dubbed the new missile "Satan 2". But it's not an official name with NATO or Russia, just something that the media uses for the clicks.

The original missile:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R-36_%28missile%29#R-36M

The new one:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RS-28_Sarmat

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

No wonder the media is using Satan II. NATO hasn't given it one or is just referring to it by number. I'd do the same thing if I was reporting on it.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

They gave it one. It's just not as evocative as "Satan":

 NATO reporting name: SS-X-29 or SS-X-30

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Well they couldn’t very well call it the Sexy 29.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago

No you can't, because Russia can't get it up!

I'll show myself out...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

Found a Techpriest

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Sounds like a Tesla model or one of Elon's kids.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

NATO hasn’t given it one or is just referring to it by number.

I'm not surprised the media went with Satan II.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

Sounds like NATO should name it “Stupid”

But really we should name all nuclear weapons Stupid anyway.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

The Kremlin is probably happy to hear it called Satan. They're getting desperate and empty threats of global nuclear war are one of the only cards they have left.