this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2024
219 points (81.6% liked)

Technology

59357 readers
4279 users here now

This is a most excellent place for technology news and articles.

Our Rules

  1. Follow the lemmy.world rules.
  2. Only tech related content.
  3. Be excellent to each another!
  4. Mod approved content bots can post up to 10 articles per day.
  5. Threads asking for personal tech support may be deleted.
  6. Politics threads may be removed.
  7. No memes allowed as posts, OK to post as comments.
  8. Only approved bots from the list below, to ask if your bot can be added please contact us.
  9. Check for duplicates before posting, duplicates may be removed

Approved Bots

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
219
Elon Musk wants to implant millions of people with Neuralink brain chips (www.independent.co.uk)
submitted 2 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
151 comments fedilink hide all child comments
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] [email protected] 52 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (9 children)

Day 1 after implantation: this is great! I now have photographic memory of everything! Best decision ever.

Day 20: I've memorized so much so fast, I'm going to have to go for the next higher up subscription level to unlock more storage.

Day 200: I'm running out of space again. Going for the plus subscription.

Day 600: ran out of storage space again. I can't afford the next higher subscription. I'm going to have to start deleting unnecessary memories. My brain has lost its natural ability to make and retain memories by itself. I can't even function on a daily basis without free storage space.

Day 700: I have run out of memories that I'm willing to part away with. I still can't afford the higher subscription. Luckily there is a cheaper tier. All I have to do is give NeuraLink full access and rights over my memories for marketing and AI training purposes.

Day 900: They have increased the cost of subscription. I can't afford it. I'm going to lose half of my storage space. I have two days to choose which of my memories to keep. The rest will be no longer accessible to me, but will still be used by Neuralink for their own purposes as they own those memories now.

Day 1200: the chip will no longer be supported next month. I can't afford the new model. It will be disabled in 30 days.

Day 1235: I have just found this diary. It explains a lot. I only wished it told me what my name is.

load more comments (8 replies)