this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2024
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Lord of the memes
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How old are these kids? Because those books get impressively eloquent as they advance, not to mention disturbing:
Are kids gonna love that or wonder what the hell he's talking about? I can't decide.
I just finished reading the LotR series with my now-11 yo son (we started a few years ago) and there were definitely plenty of sections like this that I converted to more understandable terms and concepts on the fly. Sure my son may not have heard this exact line, but he definitely got the idea that ~~Shelob was old, bad, and Sauron had encouraged get 8 in exchange for a scary guard in the tunnels into Mordor~~ the fell beasts were scary.
Edit: apparently my son may or may not have gotten an entirely different version of the book told to him!
Pretty sure the above quote was about the fell beasts, not Shelob.
Some servant that would be, using Shelob as a steed hahaha
Black riders on spiders
Australian Nazgûl.
"Come not between the bloody nazgûl 'n his prey! Or he will not slay thee in thy turn. He will beahr thee away ta the bloody houses of lamentation, beyond all dahrkness, weah thy flesh shall be devoured, 'n thy shriveled mind be left nuddy ta the bloody lidless eye. Fahkin' bloody oath cobber."