this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2024
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The way it's been explained to me is that so much of the negative interactions in life come from a tiny, tiny number of offenders who manage to be shitty to dozens and dozens of people. So anyone who has to interact with many different people will inevitably encounter that shitty interaction, while most of us normies would never actually behave in that way.
Of the literally thousands of times I've interacted with a server or cashier, I've never yelled at one. But talk to any server or cashier, and they'll all have stories of the customer who yelled at them. In other words, it can be simultaneously true that:
In other words, our lived experiences are very different, depending on which side of that interaction we might possibly be on.
When I talk to women in male dominated fields, basically every single one of them has shitty stories about sexist mistreatment. It's basically inevitable, because they are a woman who interacts with literally hundreds or thousands in their field. And even if I interact with hundreds or thousands of women in that same field, just because I don't mistreat any of them doesn't mean that my experienced sample is representative.
I wouldn't say very few. I'd say a solid 10% of people are routinely rude, impatient or entitled in a retail or restaurant setting. Even higher in some places.
I think you’re right. People want to believe that humans are good but in reality a huge number are deeply broken.
Fixed an autocorrect in edit.
It really is a matter of perspective.
You're saying that 10% of the population being awful means that a "huge number" are deeply broken.
So then 90% are being good! Mind, it doesn't take too many assholes to wreck things for everyone, but it is nice that the majority of folks really are trying to do their best. A sizeable majority, even!