this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2024
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[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Or... that's the result of hormonal changes and the brain creating an excuse for the cognitive dissonance that results. It's an evolutionary trait to further propagation of the species, nothing more. Your mind tricking you into liking something because you created it. The human mind creates fantasies all the damned time typo cope with situations.

In a different context. Your abuser isn't that bad, they provide for you, give you a place to stay, and clearly care for you, just in their own way. Clearly they actually love you and you need to return those feelings to show your appreciation. The physical abuse is only a small punishment when you misbehave, you deserved it.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)

As someone who has a child and is also a survivor of abuse: it's in very poor taste to compare babies to abusers.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

Yeah... I see where you're coming from, but... Just no. I'm a caregiver for my mother, and it's very similar to what others are talking about. Being responsible for someone you love can be a wonderful thing. If you don't want kids, don't have them, if you're not close to your parents, don't agree to be their caregiver. But that sort of familial love, knowing that you are doing what you can to make life as good as possible for another human is an amazing feeling, even when it's frustrating. Even if there are massive hormonal changes in parents when they have kids, which there are, it doesn't negate anything about the love they feel for their children. Babies are not manipulating you. Hormones help us form those bonds, but the bonds are real nonetheless.