this post was submitted on 19 May 2024
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I've been feeling really lonely lately so I've been trying to find any romance books to distract me.

However, the only books with male heterosexual protagonists I can find are either sports romances or have "alpha male" protagonists.

Are there any books where the main character is nerdier and more relatable?

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Can I butt in for a moment and actively ask what makes a male character more relatable?

I'm currently in the process of writing my first novel and that was something I never gave a thought about.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Help me on that. What it entails evades me.

I understand it as being obnoxious, rude and overbearing.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Goes further than that, imo. Toxic masculinity can also be subtle. It doesn't need to be a chest-beating guy. Besides trying to hold a death-grip on your emotions, sinking yourself into whatever society holds to be manly, I can't really think of an example rn, I've just woken up.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

If that is so, I wish you a very pleasant day!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago

If a male gets grossed out by the idea of wearing pink, that's toxic masculinity. It's ok to have preferences, like I don't like the color pink" but to be actively repulsed by it shows you have a fear of being emasculated. You have a fear that you might be seen as "not a manly man"

Other examples include being repulsed by rainbows, being afraid of showing your feelings/crying, being afraid of gay people, etc.

Good thing to have are: being willing to have a discussion without trying to "win", get angry or disregard the other person's opinion. Having women friends that you aren't trying to fuck. Having hobbies that are fun, and that you're willing to talk about because they make you excited, without trying to monetize them.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Not OP, but probably realistic is a better word for it. OP mentioned nerdy, so maybe physically weak, shorter than average, etc. Basically the opposite of 6’+ gym rat with year round 6-pack.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I'd prefer if the protagonist did have other typically nerdy traits (a poor social life, an interest in technology, movies, literature etc.) but I wouldn't exactly mind a more realistic protagonist since I don't have many choices.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago

Thank you for that insight

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 months ago

I understand. Thank you.