Important clarification/FAQ
I am not calling to coddle or excuse the behavior of bigoted men in any way!
I am calling to be kind and understanding to young men (often ages 10-20) who are very manipulable and succeptible to the massive anti feminist propaganda machine. Hope this clarifies that very important distinction. :)
Very good comments that express key points:
- Detailed summary of the situation if you're wondering what's going on
- The rhetorical value of the bear hypothetical and what this means for you
- One example of why the long-term rhetorical value of the hypothetical is poor, in the context of intersectionality
- What does disenfranchisement mean in this context?
- The importance of not asking women to tone down their expressions of fear and frustration
- "But why can't they just say it nicely?"
- The importance of participation in kindness toward young men, specifically outside the context of people speaking their experiences
Edit: This post has now been removed and restored twice. I want to encourage you all:
Be decent to one another
I think this post is a valuable thing given the current state of the Fediverse, please don't fuck it up for us by being toxic in the comments.
This whole thing is completely blown out of proportion. The fact that young disenfranchised men are getting upset that women they don't know are choosing a bear over them says that they are taking it personally when it's not.
If you're a young man, and the people around you have decided they would rather choose the bear over you, that's a sign that you need to sit down and take a hard look at yourself about why they would do that. What have you done that would make them decide that. And if you extend that feeling to random women that you don't know, then you need to sit down and take a hard look at yourself why you feel that way. You don't know the lived experience of random women. You don't know why they would choose certain death over you. Taking it personally only shows your immaturity. You can't control how other people feel. You can only control yourself. If you want to understand why women around you would choose the bear, maybe try asking them nicely and actually listen. Empathy works both ways. Showing some will encourage people to reciprocate.
"Just remember, men: under no circumstances are women ever wrong. Every problem is caused by you and must be fixed by you."
I don't really understand the point you're trying to make, would you mind expanding on it?
What are you on about? Are you trying to equivalence rape with someone hurting your feelings? That's just bizarre.
In what way is any of this like victim blaming - do you feel like a woman you've never met saying she'd rather be around a bear than you is somehow making you a victim?
Nope. Glad we've cleared that up.
Yes. It's sexism. Sexism (like racism, antisemitism, etc) victimizes all the people who are subject to it.
You are, how is it sexism, exactly?
Not cryophilia user, but I can't help but notice women raping and abusing men in many ways is a very real issue, and the one that constantly gets overlooked due to framing abuse as a "man abusing a woman" situation.
Sure, this is the most common case, but we cannot ignore the fact that women can absolutely be dangerous abusers without hurting the actual male victims.
Maybe there are better predictors of dangerous behavior than gender after all.
Of course it's a real issue, but it's in no way relevant to what we're talking about.