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Wonderful. Now where's my share?
Don't worry, you'll get a check for like $3.50 three years from now.
Not even. Looking at the 2023 Q4 subscriber counts listed on Wikipedia that's about 500 million devices, so the total fine amounts to less than 50¢ per customer.
Someone please tell me I'm calculating that terribly wrong, because I'm feeling quite angry at such a meaningless penalty.
You aren't, but it's likely some people have 2 or even 3 cell network connected devices (phone, tablet, watch, car, etc). As that articles notes it's SIM cards not people. Not that $1.50 is any better...
Also, that $3.50 was a South Park joke.
Oh, I definitely got the South Park reference!
I just got curious about the math anyway, then very, very angry. Another source indicated something like 300 million people with cell phones in the country, but it wasn't clear how many of those are customers of the affected carriers.
And 6 free months of "identity protection" which is actually just a total farce.
Well, you can sue them directly... Or you could, if you can show that you have standing. That means if they shared your specific personal information illegally then you could sue them. If you're lucky, some blood sucking lawyers will do the leg work and find out the details. Then they'll file a class action lawsuit against these companies and we'll all get emails saying, "You may be eligible for compensation! Come to our website and give us a bunch of private information so we can see if you are owed big bucks! Oh, and we promise we wont sell your information, you can trust us!"
And the cycle of life goes on...