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I absolutely am capping my tip in America. Even at an expensive restaurant. If there's a big party, or we've stayed longer than usual, then yes I'll pay more. But fuck anyone who thinks $20 is a bad tip for less than an hour of service. That's 20% on a $100 bill. I don't feel the server at a steakhouse is magically working harder to refill my water glass than a waitress at IHOP is. The premium is already factored into the price of the food. Paying strictly on a percentage basis is a completely fucked line of thinking that's led to the tipping nightmare we're in. Wake the fuck up and realize what you're advocating.
It's a question of opportunity cost. In order to be really attentive they work fewer tables, so they need to have higher margins to make up for lack of volume. If you can't afford a 15% tip, or 20% for good service, you shouldn't be eating at an expensive restaurant to begin with. That's the social compact in America, that's how it works. Until servers start being paid a living wage, you're not the arbiter of what constitutes paying "enough", you're just rejecting cultural norms and hurting servers so you can save a few bucks.
An alternative way to view this: if I order three sodas at a fancy restaurant vs three top shelf alcohols, the service is functionally the same but the bill is wildly different. Would you still say I should tip on pure percentage in the latter scenario?
You should because that's how tipping works. No one likes tipping (as a customer anyway, plenty of servers and owners do), but until servers are provided with a living wage that's how it works. You're not changing the system by tipping less - you're just being a dick.
And not for nothing, but there is a slight difference between soda service and a simple pour service. Actual liquor service usually comes with someone asking how you like it (e.g. on the rocks vs straight vs three drops of water) whereas a soda is just a soda. Sitting at a bar, no one is gonna get pissy if you're not tipping 15-20% on opening beers or straight pours, but that's just how table service works.
If they're working at a fancy restaurant, they're being paid a living wage.
You have clearly never worked in the service industry. They make the same sub minimum wage as every server unless there's a local ordinance otherwise.
I've heard legend of places that pay servers up to $5/hr!