this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2024
65 points (97.1% liked)

Greentext

4409 readers
1304 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

drop your childhood stories:
>be me, age 12
>hate showering more than anything
>it feels gross and i hate getting wet
>my mom starts telling me that if i don't shower every day then i can't eat dinner
>i want my dindin so i come up with a genius plan
>let the shower run for 10-15 minutes while i sit in the bathroom
>quickly wet my hair with sink
>mom buys it, i get dindin
>after a month she gets suspicious
>realize i have to step up my game
>now i run the shower and rub my arms/neck with hand soap
>also run my hair under the shower so it's dripping wet and not just moist
>she asks why i haven't asked her to buy shampoo yet
>come up with final version of my genius plan
>i'll stand next to the shower, let the water run, rub soap on my whole body and also use shampoo on my hair so it smells like shampoo
>then i'll rinse off in the sink
>all while the shower runs

i did this for four years until i realized i was just showering on hard mode

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Had to do x km/day on the static bike, because fat.

Got no time for that.

Old static bike, with mechanical revolution counter.

Unscrew spinning cable that feeds from the bike into the counter.

MacGyver Lego contraption, with motor, with a pointy bit that fits where the cable would go.

Motor goes brrr, do required km in seconds, plug cable back in, rinse and repeat;, parents never find out (I "exercised" while they were working).

Still fat. ๐Ÿ˜ž

[โ€“] [email protected] 0 points 10 months ago (1 children)

This seems like some "Einstein working at the patent office" type shit to me. I would have never thought how to do that and I hope that mechanical aptitude has stuck around somehow.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Yeah but Einstein actually did work. This guy's just come up with an incredibly convoluted way to make it look like you've done work.

It may have been easy to just do the exercise

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

That aptitude could be repurposed to do something useful. Programmers spend hours figuring out how to automate stuff due to laziness and desire to avoid tedium.

load more comments (2 replies)