this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2024
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You wouldn't believe what parents make up to get kids to do stuff they don't wanna do. I tell my 4 year old that the boogie man hates reading and stories, so as long as we read a bedtimes story, he won't come to get us.
"The boogie man hates it when you grab daddy a beer"
Yeah, I wish he was tall enough 😂.
why doesn't your kid want to hear stories
IDK, he just doesn't 🤷.
I think the reading part is boring for him. He's also not really keen on learning new things, he doesn't want to actually turn on his brain, and that makes the learning process kinda harder.
You're a genius for solving that the way you did.
It's so uncommon for kids not to like story time, even the squirrely kids. I used to be an elementary school librarian, and there were maybe a couple of kids per grade level (like 95 kids) that didn't like it. I tried to be as engaging as possible, use different voices, the book pages were always facing the class so they could see the pictures; nothing worked.
Maybe if I had threatened the boogie man... Maybe not. Their parents probably would've been pretty mad. Lol
He is kinda more into it now to be honest, but he did refuse at first. Maybe it was the length of the stories... they were't that lengthy, but maybe lengthy for him (as I said, he hates to have to turn on his brain... he's not stupid, I can tell from other things, things he likes doing, but he just refuses to turn on his brain "on command", i.e. when we're trying to learn something new).
I just hate how parents are nowadays to be honest... everything is considered child abuse 😒. It's a white lie that will probably get the kids to engage in the learning process. With time, they'll probably learn to like it.
Like my kid, I also believe part of the reason why he didn't like it was authority. He just hates authority, he likes doing whatever it is he's doing and boss people around to fetch things for him. We did that for a while, but then started to realize, no matter how you look at it, this kid is the boss of us, not the other way around. So, we decided to switch tactics. That did not go well most of the time. So, we decided to start lying to him about stuff like this. It works about 30, 40% of the time. You do another 20% with threats (no candy/TV/whatever if you don't do this), the rest is done with mind games (how would you feel if I did this or this).
He's just really stubborn and likes doing things his way. God forbid you show/help him to do something new, like tie shoe laces for example. He saw you do it and he wants to have a go at it, on his own. That's cool and all, but son, let me help you, you'll learn it faster. Nope, no way 😒. And then you have to watch him fail for about 30 minutes, moaning, crying, etc. all of that... and then he comes to you for help 😒... and he learns it in 2 minutes after I show him how, slowly, and he has a chance to see what's really going on, instead of just watching that thing happen in fast motion. It just takes a lot more time, that's my real beef with that... not to mention the crying and moaning and screaming... it just ruins the mood of what could have been a very positive learning experience. But hey, things are what they are 🤷. He's still my kid and I love him to death ☺️.
Don't use fear to program your kids. You're confirming the existence of the boogie man to a child, imagine how traumatic it could be for the kid to be left alone in the dark once you leave.
There has to be a better way. Not saying this is messing your kid, I just think it could mess someone's kid. Kids have pretty vivid imagination, I'd never tell them monsters that want to kill them on their sleep exist.
We have tried almost everything else (talking to him about it, puppet play where one puppet reads a story to the other one, us reading stories to each other, etc.), but nothing worked. He's just stubborn, he's like that, ever since he was a toddler. The first word he learned was "no" 😂... and it was the only thing he said for a very long time (3 or 4 months). Why? He just doesn't like to learn new things 🤷. Actually, he does, but only what peaks HIS interest. Son, that's not how life works...
And I never told him the boogie man was gonna kill us, just get us. He asked me once where is he gonna take us, I told him he was gonna take us far far away and we won't see anyone ever again, not mommy, not grandma/grandpa, not Sofie (this girl from kindergarten he really likes 😂), no one. In fact, he told us a few times (while he was enraged over god knows what, he can be like that) that he was gonna beat us up... have no idea where he heard that, maybe some of the cartoons he watches, IDK... or maybe kindergarten 🤷. Still, we had a nice little talk over this and I think he started grasping the gravity of what he said because he mentioned it only once after that and immediately showed remourse (he doesn't like to say he's sorry... you have to get it out of him with pliers, lol 😂).
Have you had him tested for ADHD?
No, there are no test like this where I live, we'd have to go abroad for that.