this post was submitted on 04 Apr 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So you're telling me that millionaires can now literally buy a trump card? Awesome...

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago

He did the same thing with the pardons. All parts of America are for sale!!!!

[–] [email protected] 84 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Question: We have recently seen that the government can and will revoke green cards at will, why would anybody be interested in this knowing that it offers them at best ephemeral protections.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Money guarantees that. You know who doesn't have 5 million bucks? A student studying in USA who might protest against genocide in Gaza. You know who has 5 millions? People like Venesuelan cartel members.

This is just asinine and reeks of similar level of greed as selling bath water to thirsty horny teenagers. It's no fucking different. It's just a gold card with ugly Trump's face for a lot more money.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 days ago

Belle Delphine is not greedy she's amazing and if I keep giving her money she'll notice me.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You just made me think of Trump bath water and now I hate you immensely.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Well I wasn't think of that BEFORE you posted.....but I am NOW!!!

UGH!!! Now I'm wondering if the bath water washes off his suntan and turns the water orange. YOU DID THIS!!! YOU PUT THAT IMAGE IN MY HEAD!!!

burns your house down

No jury would convict me.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

And in 1 week time you'll see news with Trump selling his bath water in front of White House lmao

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 days ago

It's not about citizenship, it's about access. They know that it doesn't guarantee citizenship or protection, that's what the rest of their money is for.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

US law only applies to poor people.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

LMFAO, if I was rich, I'll just go to some EU country. Yes I probably get taxed like hell, but still, people are happier which means there's less resentment towards rich people, which means I'm much less likely to get Luigi'd. Win-Win. And the obvious, no fascism, no falling out of windows.

(If I was like really rich, I'll probably donate money on top of the taxes, since I wouldn't be able to use it all anyways.)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

There is substantial resentment on my side against rich oligarchs buying up German real estate and causing the COL crisis we are currently in.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 2 days ago

how is this not the onion is sounds EXACTLY like an onion article even moreso than any other ive ever seen

[–] [email protected] 31 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Why would an immigrant want to come here right now? Trump just sent a bunch of people to El Salvador to rot in prison with no due process. A fancy card wouldn't save them any more than the court order saved Kilmar Armando Abrego Garcia.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago

The fancy card is just his way of getting the "right types" of people to immigrate to the US.

Aka filthy rich.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago

It's just another way to bribe him

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 days ago

Is that his fucking mugshot?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Officer: Sir, do you have a green card?
Rich brown guy: No, but I have a gold--
Officer: proceeds to beat Rich Brown Guy

[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 days ago (2 children)

He also said he will be the first to buy one.... Like... what?.....Did he forgot he already has us citizenship?

[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

This is probably why he wants it:

Unlike American citizens, gold card holders will not have to pay taxes to the U.S. government on their overseas income.

Not sure if that applies to us citizens with gold cards though.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'd be curious to know if that's a law, or just another case of Trump Says.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Could you try to obfuscate your response a bit?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

There's no way that doesn't apply to him in his own mind. The US is one of only a few countries that double-tax foreign income and the super-wealthy with multinational holdings hate it. $5m to eliminate entire categories of tax? I could see him going through this whole thing just for that single rider.

Though there are also several foreign nationals in his orbit who would greatly benefit from such a program as well...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

What the fuuuuuuuuck. That's the real story here.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

Putin does not..

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 days ago (1 children)

One of the most worthless human beings to ever walk the earth. What a disaster. First it’s a Tesla yard sale on the White House front lawn and now it’s a monopoly gold card with that ugly Nazis face adorned in it.

Dude is craving attention so much that he needed to put his face on something.

His face should be centred inside of a bullseye.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

I mean he’s more like the ancient emperor’s than anything else. I see a Julius Caesar moment coming. I don’t condone it but people are just on the brink of losing everything and there’s going to be a retiree that will have nothing to lose soon.

So no, he isn’t the dumbest. There were quite a lot of them that we know about. He’s just our dumb one. Ugh.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 days ago (2 children)

this mf really wants to be the music man lmao this some used car salesman shit

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

starts with p which rhymes with t and thats TROUBLE

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

lol, I played in the pit for my high school’s The Music Man show. Brought back some memories.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago

Does this golden card cover immigrants of color or just Russians?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago

All animals are equal but some are more equal than others.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

dude put his own fucking face on it 🤣

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Remember when he delayed the COVID stimulus checks because he wanted his name on them? He has zero shame.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

@Quetzalcutlass @umbrella and it was a stupid but effective tactic that let the republics know he was their guy. would that the dems would be so forward.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

As much as I'd hate for Democrats to start using the same tactics that tore national unity apart, taking the high road hasn't really worked thus far. Democrats are terrible at messaging, while Republicans excel at it despite having terrible messages.

If I ever became insanely wealthy (with the associated lapse in ethics), I'd fund a social media blitz that uses all the same underhanded tactics Republicans do to reach their voters, but that would contain the objective truth in convenient, bite-sized quotables since that's what seems to work, with citations so any actually literate viewers can verify the information.

If democracy is failing due to a glut of bad information, we should put out good information faster and better and in a way that works. Speeches and policy pages don't work in the modern era, pithy one-liners do.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

These are the same cards that used to require 1 million in cash and 4 million in small business investment with proven local employees right?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You're thinking the EB-5 visa program, I think. That was the fifth "employment based" visa.

You're sort of right, but your numbers are off. It's $1.8 million in cash, but the real kicker is that you need to sustain those 10+ permanent US employees through your investments. Been a popular program since 1990, about 12,000 folks use it a year lately. It's still a thing, you can apply for one today.

https://www.uscis.gov/working-in-the-united-states/permanent-workers/employment-based-immigration-fifth-preference-eb-5/about-the-eb-5-visa-classification

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

A much better deal than handing $5M to US Government. Just buy or start a restaurant, theoretically returning a fair ROI. But losing less than $5M should be easy.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Having watched kitchen nightmares, it's pretty easy to lose that kinda money on a restaurant too

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Well, for 5 million it'll be a hard choice.

But I'll take the money and come over if you want it so much orange man.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Is this the one that includes acces to Trump Gaza?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Of course not, the Fast Ride card is sold separately and it's another couple million.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

Ultra high cost of living about to go through the roof higher. Hitler level loyalty oath required to not be harassed, and even campaigners have gotten face eaten by leopard deportation or fired. There are many cheaper places in world to live in, without having to pay as much for access.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

You can also buy toilet paper with his face on it

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

This man is just the manifestation of Cringe

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

When you're that gross to look at, you'd think he'd want to avoid reminding people that that is what he looks like but no....

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Why is his mugshot on it

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

this scammer is taking it up a notch I see...