this post was submitted on 22 Jul 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 132 points 3 months ago (3 children)

What did anon do wrong? It's a blithe, silly answer and bothers nobody. Anon can totally go back.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You're not wrong, but it comes down to delivery. I've said a lot of bizarre, goofy lines in my time, in various stages of social aptitude. The same line comes across very differently based on whether it's said confidently with a self-assured smile, or muttered while looking at your shoes.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago

This is my problem, I am impulsive and silly enough to still say things, but the way they come out sometimes makes me want to die a little inside and stop being perceived forever.

Sometimes if I am not doing too badly I still can turn it around, where the very failure of delivery can on its own get the laughs (or groans). If I sort of stay with it long enough to express something like "yeah, that was bad wasn't it? want more?". But it does require a minimum of social aptitude like you said, which for me varies a lot.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 months ago

Literally the type of line I'd use as a litmus test to see if people were cool.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

Anon is locked into self directed attention showing him his shame when considering that there is a whimsical part of himself known as the chocolate man inside himself. Why this makes him ashamed is not specified. I speculate that there is a belief that if other people knew he would be the subject of ridicule.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 3 months ago

Be silly. It makes the world a better place.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 months ago

Come back, Anon. We'll just write Chocolate Man on your cups, its okay.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago

Anon returns to chocolate land never to be seen again.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

👉😎👉Zoop!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

You rolled a nat 20 on your response and then chose to fail the check

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Donut city over here

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Imo he fucking nailed that interaction.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

How offensive of the cashier!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Chocolate man ran, but we chocolate man stan.