this post was submitted on 08 May 2024
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My family immigrated to the UK from Poland when I was six. I'm 20 now, speak much better English than Polish and feel like this is my land/culture. However I have a Polish first and last name, Polish passport and "unique" accent everyone picks up on, so despite this I'm usually perceived as an outsider. It makes me really sad because I don't "belong" in Poland anymore either. Everything seems so complicated especially as I've gotten older with having to get the right documentation for work and opening a bank account and etc also.... Not even sure if I can vote in the next general election even though I feel like I should be able to?

I've had a few nasty instances of being told to go back to my own country, even had a conker thrown at my head while a boy yelled Polski at me in year 11, and tbh even just been seen as a novelty and being asked to say something in Polish has gotten really old. I guess I'm just wondering if I'll ever truly fit in. For some context, I grew up in North England and now live in Wales

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Not in the UK alongside British people for sure.

I'm in the same boat but not from Poland and I came over a tad later (12) but I'm also 5 years older.

I don't actually have an accent inherently but I always use an American one to obscure my country of origin.

It's really quite a backwards little country and they have an insular culture and hot opinions on 'de immigants' amongst other things, they're just polite enough to keep it to the voting booth most of the time until the the child alcoholism and the FAS kicks in.

They will always see you as defined by your nationality first because to them, it makes you fundamentally different as a person because they themselves are fundamentally defined by their nationality - (you can often tell by how much they rely on this as material for 'banter') - rather than how many other people see it - as a random side note of historical background of yet another human on this planet - a citizen of the world if you will.

I recall meeting a friend group of my S.O. who's been here all her life and went to school with those people and still the occasional joke about her country of origin gets a big laugh, not to mention the only brown person at the table only ever joked and got joked to about being Muslim, it wasn't offensive or anything, but you'd think the guy was a hardcore religious leader by how much it came up when he seemed like just some guy to me.

They might keep you around to pitch in with a fun fact about Poland (even if you don't really know any) or say something funny (to them) in your accent/language, but you'll never be actually British and treated as just another one of the peeps about the place.

Try to surround yourself with other people from diverse backgrounds if you can, which won't be possible in the norf (idk about Wales, never been) but you can definitely do this in London as British people are far and few between and so long as you steer clear of other majorly represented insular ethnic groups you can maybe find a multinational clique or what I had more luck with - an eastern european one with similar levels of integration and shared interests etc., and maybe consider living or visiting elsewhere, like the US which is far more diverse and your background matters far less.

Hope this helps.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

British people are few and far between in London? Ok then.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)

Compared to the rest of the country in the ethnic-cultural sense? Yeah absolutely.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_London

London is 36.8% White British

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manchester

For comparison a major metropolitan area like the city of Manchester is 59.3% White British

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brighton_and_Hove#

Brighton is 80.5% White British

Furthermore in London, 40.7% of people are born in another country, and 56.8% of people are born to a foreign-born mother. This is of course including those who identify as White British on the census.

That's what makes London so different from the rest of the country imo, and a way better place to be as a young person who doesn't feel like they belong elsewhere.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

We all agree London is cosmopolitan.

I think they were objecting to the phrase "few and far between".

You really can't use it to describe a situation of almost 2 in 5.

If 2 in every 5 cars you see are red you can't say red cars are few and far between.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Oh sure. I was speaking relatively.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Yee, 's why I left.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Compared to the rest of the country in the ethnic-cultural sense? Yeah absolutely.

Nobody disputes that London has a substantially more diverse population than other places - but it's still completely untrue to say "British people are few and far between" in London, even if you restrict it to White British (which your original claim did not).

[–] [email protected] 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Simmer down buddy, no need to get your blood pressure up - I clarified the statement didn't I?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Blood pressure is fine, thanks.

You did, but I wasn't wrong to object to your original, unclarified claim.

The reason I did is that it's the kind of thing that you hear being used as a racist dog whistle - "Oh, there are parts of London that are no-go areas, you never see a white face..." etc.

I'm not saying you were doing that, but the way you worded it left it open to that interpretation.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Ah in that case yeah I definitely did not mean it that way, but it's also not a good look for the left to come off as to utterly deny demographics when facts are very easy to find, especially if you have a pro-immigration stance.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

it's also not a good look for the left to come off as to utterly deny demographics

Not sure if you mean me here, but I didn't think I was doing that at all.